Tuesday 2: IMPOTENCE

Hello again, as always I'm sorry for not writing more often.

Since a few years I propose to make a way for the future, like everybody I suppose. I try to discover what I wanna be, how will my life would be , what will I do to decide my way … but lately I don't obtain anything of what I propose myself. It isn't because they are unattainable aims, in fact every time they are more attainable; it is not also because it don't try it or because I don't want it.

Gradually I see how the opportunities are ended and how the doors are closed without opening new windows. And I say this with 16 years.

 As I grow up, life is more hypocritical, you are losing opportunities, gaining defeats, the ways to the imagination are vanishing , and we turn into marionettes of the situations. We don't live for the present, not even for a future; we live dreaming that some day all what prevents us from getting our dreams will end up , but this is dangerous because if you don't break your obstacles, they will continue there.

Many preambles to come to say that persons live impotent in our own lives. We like to think that we have the keys of our future, that we are owners of our acts and lives but it's not like that. It rains, the catastrophes happen, the lottery makes us millionaires, the people die, we grow … and all of that, without we decide it, determines our lives.

It is not a pessimistic post, far from it. I suppose that realize is a part of the life.

From http://thebeautyofsports.tumblr.com/

I don't want to lose anything for not having tried to obtain it again, I won't return to fall down in the mediocrity being able to look for the genius, I refuse to agree to follow the fingerprints on the way of another persons being able to do my own way. I don't want to return to feel impotent in my own life because it would be like to admit that I've given up myself, and I'm not a coward.

From Facebook

It's enough of apologize myself  for things that I might have done and I didn't do. It's enough of excusing myself.
The impotence includes many aspects of our life without we could do nothing to change it, so when I has an opportunity that depends only of me, I won't lose it, because enough is taken already by the impotence, for giving what we still having.

This is a realistic and not pessimistic post.

Tuesday 31: Respect

Hello I've been so much without writing but I promised myself to do it before February.

One day, when it was returning of the high school a few boys in the park were laughing at an old lady who was in a window, she was stooping to take something of the floor and as consequence of many years, it was noticed that this was costing her physically. The boys of the park were laughing at her non-stoping. Later, when it had already happened, they asked me if there was a shop closer. My natural response was to tell them F*** U! but no, I said where it was to him and I go straight. The lady who they were laughing at, the one of the window was my grandmother.

 There are times where you wish that people mature a little. Whoever is the person that we have ahead, it deserves respect . Black, short, ill, elders, homosexuals, children, Asians, Caucasians … our capacities don't depend of it, but over all they are persons! Like us, like your families. The world must mature a little, because it lives in a constant idiot adolescence, even too idiot for teenagers. You'll know what do you do with your life but when this one concerns the life of others, at least respect them whoever they are.

The past is remembered only to learn of him. I believe that already there have been enough examples of hate for race, sex, age … Nazis, homophobes, racists … it isn't anything new, is a part of the past, of our history and is there for makins us learn.

We are persons and it's over any stupid and easy hate.

Thanks for reading!

Friday 18: Secret untill last paragraph...

"These blue eyes point at his face. All the history pass before this eyes, who had never lived something similar. They had not known anybody with whom sharing their moments, their needs and specially, their pillow.
They look at each other, these blue eyes find the brown of the girl that, on having noticed it, tremble. They know it's true, it's the moment. They free fom all the fear, from the pressure. They take the initiative. They move their hands to brushing ther face. They cares it, goes down from the face for the back to coming to her waist. They bring his lips closer, notice their breathing, slow, speeding up little by little. Their lips join and in this moment nothing matters.

The blue eyes stay closed. The brown eyes of the girl reflect passion."

But  there is only one problem, the blue eyes also belong to a girl. 

For many this story was perfect untill the last paragraph. In my opinion, it has not changed, continues being perfect. I'm not lesbian, for the ones who were seized by doubt, but I don't think that it's slightly bad not even strange. It's something normal and from this humble blog I want to ask for comprehension.

 

"Don't let your fears stand in the way of your dreams"

"Where there is love, there is not imposition"- Einstein

 "Sad time ours! It's easier to dismantle an atom than a prejudice"- Einstein